Hope is in what?

Whew...I am so worn out. Shopping, baking, sending out TONS of cards, parties, decorating, traveling. Christmas...what a great season but one heck of a busy one. I helped with a children's party today and oh to see their eyes light up when they learned about Jesus. Wow! I sure wish my eyes lit up like that. To have the faith of a child. I just hope that they know the true reason we celebrate Christmas, the birth of our Savior.
I am studying my Sunday school lesson. It is from 1 Peter chapter 1. It is about having hope. Not the kind of hope people wish desperately for a favorable outcome but the hope that only God can give. The confident expectation that the promises God says he will do, will be done.
God has blessed me beyond measure this year. I don't deserve anything he has given me: a great job, faithful friends and family, a home, transportation, great church, good health. Everyday God gives me so much. I hope he knows that I am thankful, even though I sometimes don't show him.
From The Message
1 Peter 1:13-16 A Future In God
So roll up your sleeves, put your mind in gear, be totally ready to receive the gift that's coming when Jesus arrives.Don't lazily slip back into those old grooves of evil, doing just what you feel like doing. You didn't know any better then, you do now. As obedient children, let yourselves be pulled into a way of life shaped by God's life, a life energetic and blazing with hiliness. God said, "I am holy, you be holy."
Lord, let my hope be only in you. Amen.

BBBRRRRR

No not really. It was 75 degrees today and it is November. It is snowing in Montana so it is BBBRRRRR there. So I took a walk by the river for lunch. So very nice. The trees are so BEAUTIFUL! Fall is such a great season. The trees are in so many different vibrant colors. Then I BBQ'd for dinner....yummy! And now the stars are out in full force. What a great day! Such an awesome day. So much to be thankful for.

The Road to Unafraid

I love to read. I am actually reading a few books right now. I have a Chaplain friend, Jeff Struecker who has written a book called The Road to Unafraid. He writes, "the difference between being a coward and hero is not whether you're scared, it's what you do while you're scared." Jeff tells his story and WOW what a story. He is a man of God, a great husband, a great father and a fantastic Chaplain. If you want to be blessed, please get a copy and read it.

Are you kidding me?

I was just beginning to feel like my life was starting to make a turn for the better. I have a boyfriend who treats me like a queen. I am enjoying where I live and just love being at home in the evenings. I have a job that pays the bills.
And then on Saturday I get an email from a woman who claims she fell in love with my ex last year. She met him May/June of 2005, I am guessing when he got to Iraq and she says she fell head over heals for him. So sad for her & him. I wonder how many other woman Lance has all over the world? I really want the best for him but am so angry for what he has done to me. How embarassing this is. I want us both to move on with our lives and to be happy again. But then I get this news and I am beat down again. I am realizing I didn't know the man who I was married to for 11 1/2 years. How many lies did he tell me?
I am trying to concentrate on things I can control and will try not to worry about things that are out of my control. I have to believe I will get through this someday.

Vince & Nashville Photos

Here is Vince at the Grand Ole Opry, Deb at the Wildhorse Saloon & me

Support our troops

Our troops need to know we are behind them. The media never portrays the good we are doing in the war. Thank a soldier for what they are doing. I just recieved this link from a Chaplain's wife. WOW! It is amazing. I have so many friends that are in the military. I thank God for them and their service to God and our country. Thank you also to their families who are making such a sacrifice for our freedom.

Until Then

Nashville ROCKS

Deb and I had a great time. We ate at the Melting Pot Friday night and I must say it was one of the best meals I have ever had. We had a blast! Then we went to the Wildhorse Saloon. We laughed & laughed at a guy dancing that thought he could dance but all he was doing was shaking his bootie & had his arms in the air. It was quite hysterical. Sat. we took a tour & saw where a lot of the stars live. Then we went to The Hermitage. So interesting. We really enjoyed that. Then we went to The Merchant & had another great meal. Then we went to the Grand Ole Opry. WOW! You just have to go. We saw Vince Gill (such a nice guy & not bad to look at either :), Patty Loveless, Steve Wariner (such a cutie too) and a few others. It was great! I'll post pictures later. Oh and staying at the Opryland Hotel is a must. Such a classy place. Thanks Deb!

Winter clothes

I love FALL. That means winter is right around the corner so I am in the process of going through my winter clothes and getting them out. YEAH HOO! It is 42 degrees right now and I am loving that. Ray & I sat on my deck the other night. Such great weather. It was too cloudy to see stars but we still had a good time together. I am excited for this weekend. I have a friend flying to Nashville from Montana. I will be going to Nashville to stay with her a couple of days. We are planning on going to The Melting Pot for dinner. We also have tickets to see Vince Gill at the Grand Ole Opry. It will be a great ending to a long week. I found out Lance is getting married to his mistress Thanksgiving weekend. Geez. He didn't waste any time. I know he will be taking a lot of baggage into this marriage and that isn't good. I know it isn't any of my business but I am still concerned for him. I have learned a lot from the divorce. I wish he has. Anyhow, I am trying to move on with my life and thank goodness have found happiness again. Thanks Ray :) You are such a blessing!

Happiness found

It has been a busy few weeks. Many of you are asking about Lance. He is out of the military and I believe is working for the Phoenix police department. He moved to Phoenix right after he got out of the Army.
I am still working and getting through life one day at a time. I still long to be in Montana and am applying for jobs up there. And I am dating a wonderful man. Ray is 35 and treats me like a queen. He said his goal is to make me happy. And every day for the past couple of weeks I have had a smile on my face. He is so down to earth and such a breath of fresh air. It feels so great to be happy again. I didn't know if I could but I am happy. Ray is so easy to talk to and we have a lot of fun together. We have become good friends and I look forward to spending more time with him.
Last weekend I went to Memphis for the Extraordinary Women conference. It was a great conference. Then the people I went with (including 6 children) went to the Memphis Zoo. Wow! What a great zoo! My favorite part was the polar bear. He was swimming & playing in the water. So fun to watch.
Well that is all for now. Please keep the Sprayberry family in your prayers and Keri. They lost loved ones this week and they have been on my mind a lot.

Monthly blogging

Well I won't be suprised if no one is checking to see if I have blogged. I know...I know. It has been awhile since my last update. I don't have a good excuse. Well if you considering vacationing in Montana, I'll use that one. I had a GREAT time seeing family, friends, fishing, camping, touring Yellowstone National Park and trying to decide if that is where I should be. I think it is but no job has opened up yet. I am trying to be patient and not rush anything. I am applying for jobs there though. I have been away from family for 12 years and miss being them. I am doing fine here but just feel I would be happier in Montana. I love the outdoors and miss camping, fishing, hiking & watching the sunset over mountains. Wow! It is an incredible sight.
I am also starting to date again. It is so scary but I am taking the plunge. I have met a really nice guy but I am just scared to get hurt again and don't want to give my heart away again for it to be stomped on. So I am taking it so slow and hoping for the best. I just want to have fun.
Well I will try and post more often. No promises though. I am teaching Sunday school, helping with Awanas on Sunday nights and enjoying spending time with friends. Fall is here and I love this time of year. So I am hoping to spend more time outside.

Testimony

When you become a Christian, your testimony begins. You have a story to tell about your life before and after your relationship with Christ. My pastor is going through a series on how God brings you through struggles in your life. He said he thought I was ready to tell my story and asked if I would pray about telling it. So I did Sunday evening. Here is the gist of it.

I was 21 when I married in 1994. I just knew by the time I hit 25 years old, I would have 2 children and live in a home with a white picket fence. God had different plans for me. In Aug 1995 I became a Christian & moved around with my husband who was in the military for 11 ½ years. Life has brought me ups and downs but nothing compared to what I went through this year.

May 2005 we moved here from Ft. Hood, TX and joined First Baptist Church Oak Grove the day before my husband left for Iraq for 8 months. January 2006 my husband came home and told me he had an affair & decided to divorce me. I felt all alone. Not something I had planned. A friend told me a couple of weeks ago if God brings you to it, He will bring you through it. He never gives you something you cannot handle. God knew this was going to happen to me and prepared me to deal with the situation.

Life can be so confusing when it is all about us. We need to keep our focus on Christ. We need to remember we are only here for a short time. I could become bitter. I could have a pity party, which I have had but I cannot continue to live that life. I need to choose joy. I need to choose to allow Christ to be my rock, my redeemer.

I have been going to a Bible study and we have been going through Beth Moore’s Beloved Disciple. She said Christ’s appointments are never haphazard. He can accomplish anything he desires by merely thinking it into existence. He assigns us to certain tasks because the experience is often as important as the accomplishment.

God could have made this all turn out differently. But He chose not to. I have to learn from this experience and find out what God wants me to learn from it. I have to be obedient to God more than ever and have been praying where He wants me to serve him. I don’t have children or a husband could and will serve God anywhere.

God promised that if I remain faithful to Him, He will bring blessings upon me. Blessings I could have never even thought of. I have to be patient and realize my life is in His time, not my own. Once I realized this and felt as though I wasn’t going through this alone, I began to heal and go on with me life. I also had to give my life to God and know that He is in control. I love being in control but in order for me to be happy, I had to let go of my entire life.

Isaiah 58:11 says And the Lord will continually guide you, and satisfy your desire in scorched places, and give you strength to your bones; and you will be like a watered garden, and like a spring of water whose waters do not fail

Christ said Christians would suffer. Being a Christian isn’t easy but if we deal with our trials the way Christ did, we can and will get through them. Seek out people to pray for you. Christ asked his disciples to pray for him.

I am so thankful for my friends and family for being there for me even when I didn’t even feel like leaving my house. They prayed with me and made sure I was taking care of myself. We have a choice to live in the flesh or live for Christ.

Gal 2:20 says I have been crucified with Christ and it is no longer I who live but Christ lives in me and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and delivered Himself up for me.

MT Here I come

I just got done making travel arrangements to go to Montana in August. I am so excited! Fishing, camping, boating, seeing friends & family. I can't wait! I hope I remember my camera so I can post some photos.
I had a busy week but a good one. It seems whenever it is a short week, having Tues off from work, it feels like an extra long week. Strange how that works.
Well I am going to a BBQ tonight. Tomorrow we am heading to Nashville to get a friend from the airport. We may stop somewhere and have supper. Fun! Fun!
A friend just stopped by to deliver some veggies she got from an Amish farm. YUMMY! Fresh corn, beans, blackberries, tomatoes! Another friend is bringing me a homemade biscuit with bacon! I am so spoiled & love every minute of it. God has blessed me with so many great friends. I have such a great support system here. I am so blessed! I pray I can bless my friends as they so have blessed me.

My new home

Simba loves it here and loves to run around in the back yard. She has chased many rabbits but just can't seem to catch any...thank goodness!

Last June blog

Well I thought I would get one last blog in before I have to turn my calendar to another month. Where are the months going? Well mine are ticking away. I hope you are enjoying your summer. Well I am officially divorced, moved into my own place and trying to get moved on with my life. I am seeking where God wants me to serve. I am undecided what I am going to do for the rest of my life so I am just working at a friend's company and getting my feet going again. I have come to grips, sort of, with the fact I will remain childess for a bit longer. I know God will give me children when the time is right. Lance's sin got in the way of Gracie coming into our family but I was able to love her, pray for her for a short time. I hope I get to meet her someday, maybe here on earth or in heaven. She holds such a special place in my heart. I have a photo of her on my desk to remind me that children are such a gift from God and we should never lose sight of that. There are so many children that need to be loved. I am longing to be a mother and I had it in my grasp but Satan took that away. But God has better things in store for me. He loves me like no human can. I hold onto that and know I will move on. I am ready to move on and begin this new season in my life.

Sinks in

How many times do you have to read something in order that you understand what you are reading? Well I don't know how many times I have read through the Psalms but it seems as though I am beginning to understand what I read. I don't know if I had to go through a trial in order that my heart would be open to God to teach me something. To trust God with everything...what a feeling of relief. I give things to God that I don't have control over but I seem to take them back when God doesn't take care of it. But if I were to be patient, He will, in his own time, take care of it.
In Psalm 31: 14-18
But I trust in you, O LORD; I say, "You are my God." My times are in your hands; deliver me from my enemies and from those who pursue me. Let your face shine on your servant; save me in your unfailing love (AMEN). Let me not be put to shame; O LORD, for I have cried out to you; but let the wicked be put to shame and lie silent in the grave. Let their lying lips be silenced, for with pride and contempt they speak arrogantly again the righteous.
I am still doing the Bible study by Beth Moore called Beloved Disciple. She has such a gift of showing what the Word of God says. So inspiring and hits home everytime I listen to her. God doesn't say our life will be easy. We will suffer. But if you stay faithful to him, he will bring you out of the suffering and will pour blessings upon you. He is so good and his grace is sufficient for me.

Still blogging?

Yes I am! I have been so busy though so I haven't been able to update my blog like I should be. So please forgive me. I have moved and am finally getting settled. It took me awhile to get my internet hooked back up and I just am not back into my routine yet. I am still unpacking. Oh and I got a job, which takes up a lot of my time as well. But I am enjoying my new place and also my new job. Well that is all for now. Keep checking back. I will try and do better. Hope you are having a great summer so far. Mine has been hot but enjoying it so far. Maybe going to a free country concert next week.

Spider web

During World War II, a US Marine was separated from his unit on a Pacific Island. The fighting had been intense, and in the smoke and the crossfire he had lost touch with his comrades. Along in the jungle, he could hear enemy soldiers coming in his direction. Scrambling for cover, he found his way up a high ridge to several small caves in the rock. Quickly he crawled inside one of the caves. Although safe for the moment, he realized that once the enemy soldiers looking for him swept up the ridge, they would quickly search all the caves and he would be killed. As he waited, he prayed, Lord, if it be your will, please protect me. Whatever your will though, I love you and trust you. Amen. After praying, he was quietly listening to the enemy begin to draw close. He thought, well, I guess the Lord is not going to help me out of this one. Then he saw a spider begin to build a web over the front of his cave. As he watched, listening to the enemy searching for him all the while, the spider layered strand after strand of web across the opening of the cave. He thought what I need is a brick wall and what the Lord has sent me is a spider web. God does have a sense of humor. As the enemy drew closer, he watched from the darkness of his hideout and could see them searching one cave after another. As they came to his, he got ready to make his last stand. To his amazement, however, after glancing in the direction of his cave, they moved on. Suddenly, he realized that with the spider web over the entrance, his cave looked as if no one had entered for quite a while. Lord, forgive me, prayed the young man. I had forgotten that in you a spider's web is stronger than a brick wall. We all face times of great trouble. When we do, it is so easy to forget the victories that God would work in our lives, sometimes in the most surprising ways. As the great leader, Nehemiah, reminded the people of Israel when they faced the task of rebuilding Jerusalem, in God we will have success. (Nehemiah 2:20)
Remember, whatever is happening in your life with God, a mere spider's web can become a brick wall of protection. Believe He is with you always. Just speak His name through Jesus His Son, and you will see His great power and love for you.

Amazing things

God is amazing, isn't He? I am doing the study by Beth Moore called Beloved Disciple, which is about John's ministry. WOW! To learn to trust Christ in everything, everyday. It is amazing how I look back on my life and how I trusted in other things. I am praying about teaching this study at church. I believe this study will change my life and the lives of those who will do this study. In Joshua 3:5, Consecrate yoursleves, for tomorrow the Lord will do amazing things among you. He can and will use anyone. You just have to let Him and get in line with His will. Thank you for your prayers. They are being answered!

Tagged of sorts

I've been tagged of sorts. Play along if you like. Leave your name in a comment. No anonymous please. I got this off a friend of a friend's blog. It made for interesting comments since she has never met me.

1. I'll respond with something I like about you.
2. I'll tell you what song or movie reminds me of you.
3. I'll ask you a question.
4. I'll tell you my first/clearest memory of you.
5. I'll say something that only makes sense to you and me.
6. I'll describe our final fight to the death.
7. If I do this for you, you must post this on your blog.

Oprah's take on a man

I got this in an email today. Thought it was worth sharing.

If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay.
Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior. Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.
Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be.
Slower is better.
Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy.
If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't "be friends".
A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend. Don't settle.
If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is.
Don't stay because you think "it will get better."You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.
The only person you can control in a relationship is you.
Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently?
Always have your own set of friends separate from his.
Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you.
If something bothers you, speak up.
Never let a man know everything. He will use it against youlater.
You cannot change a man's behavior. Change comes from within.
Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are...even if he has more education or in a better job.
Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less.
Never let a man define who you are.
Never borrow someone else's man. If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you.
A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.
All men are NOT dogs.
You should not be the one doing all the bending... compromise is two way street.
You need time to heal between relationships... there is nothing cute about baggage... Deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship.
You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you... a relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals... look for someone complimentary... not supplementary.
Dating is fun... even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr. Right.
Make him miss you sometimes... when a man always know where Youare, and you're always readily available to him - he takes it forgranted.
Never move into his mother's house.
Never co-sign for a man.
Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need.
Keep him in your radar but get to know others.
Share this with other women and men (just so they know)... You'll make someone smile, another rethink her/his choices, and another woman prepare, and a man aware.

Birthdays

Gracie turned a year old on the 9th of April. I turned a year older on the 19th. Funny how God brought her into my life and we were born the same month. I don't know for sure if she was born on the 9th but that is when we would have celebrated. I guess that was God's way, He knew I would never actually meet her, at least not yet, to make sure I would think of her every year. And believe me, I will. She has such a special place in my heart. I pray that she had a good birthday with a family who loves her. I hope she has been adopted already. To spend a birthday in an orphanage can't be a fond memory. I was so hoping to celebrate our birthdays together. God may allow us to meet someday. I don't know what God has in store for my life but I know it will include me being a mother. I don't know if I will adopt or have my own but I do know I want to be a mother someday. This year my birthday was great. I was able to spend some time with good friends. I was able to celebrate all week actually and not just one day. I am so thankful for the many friends I have. I am so blessed and am so greatful for my true friends. You know who you are so I am thanking you! May God bless you as you have blessed me.

Everything with a place and a purpose

Proverbs 16
Mortals make elaborate plans, but God has the last word. Humans are satisfied with whatever looks good; God probes for what is good. Put God in charge of your work, then what you've planned will take place. God made everything with a place and purpose; even the wicked are included-but for judgment. God can't stomach arrogance or pretense; believe me, he'll put those upstarts in their place. Guild is banished through love and truth; Fear-of-God deflects evil (AMEN!!). When God approves of your life, even your enemies will end up shaking your hand. Far better to be right and poor than to be wrong and rich. We plan the way we want to live, but only God makes us able to live it.

Enjoy this wonderful Easter season!

Test Time

This is a devotional from an Army Chaplain. I thought it would encourage you as it did me. Blessings to you during this Easter season. Spring is such a time of renewal for me.

“Test Time”
Tomorrow morning I am going to be tested. I am going to pull myself up out of bed at 0430 to go take a PT test and I am not looking forward to it. Even though in my almost 15 years of active duty and over 7 years of National Guard and Reserve duty I have never failed a PT test, I am still a little nervous. What if something goes wrong? What if I have the world’s toughest grader? What if I get hurt and can’t do as well? Oh well, I still have to go because I know that If I am going to be in the Army then PT tests are a part of life. I also know that PT tests only help to make me stronger.
Spiritual tests are also a part of life. While we may not look forward to having our faith tested, we might as well get used to tests. Even though tests are no fun, God is always fair, always with us and always willing to give us His grace and strength to help us. So, when the next test comes your way, when everything is going wrong, when the children are screaming, when you are running late for work, when the devil is working overtime on you, when the tire is flat and your bank account is empty, smile! Remember, it’s all just another test. Keep trusting God, keep praying, hang in there, and you will make it through. At least until the next test comes your way. Besides, testing will only make you stronger.
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance” (James 1:2-3).

Happy Easter

Click here for a great Easter message:

Happy Easter

Wonderful joy ahead

1 Peter 1: 6-9 So be truly glad! There is wonderful joy ahead, even though it is necessary for you to endure many trials for a while. These trials are only to test your faith, to show that it is strong and pure. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold – and your faith is far more precious to God than mere gold. So if your faith remains strong after being tried by fiery trials, it will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day when Jesus Christ is revealed to the whole world. You love him even though you have never seen him. Though you do not see him, you trust him; and even now you are happy with a glorious, inexpressible joy. Your reward for trusting him will be the salvation of your souls.

Spring

I just love spring. My flowers are blooming & I cut my lawn for the first time this season. It looks great. I hope it continues to stay nice. We had frost over the weekend. So the mornings were chilly. Simba got her haircut so she is ready for the heat. I am still job searching. No leads yet but I'll keep you posted. I am being patient and waiting on the Lord's direction for my life. We had revival this weekend at church and I sure needed reviving. The preacher spoke of "A Trip to the Potter's House". He spoke of us being a vessel. We are a vessel, formed by God to do His work. And God gives us 2nd chances, well more than just a 2nd chance. Isn't that awesome? He doesn't throw us away like a piece of clay that a potter doesn't like. We are retreaded & revived & give more chances than we deserve. He make us new all over again if we repent. A new start. Isn't that what we all need sometimes?
I read this morning in 2 Timothy 2:20-22 about this.
Now in a large house there are not only gold and silver vessels, but also vessels of wood and of earthenware, and some to honor and some to dishonor. Therefore, if anyone cleanses (asks for forgiveness) himself from these things, he will be a vessel for honor, sanctified, useful to the Master, prepared for every good work. Now flee from yuothful lusts and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, with those call on the Lord from a pure heart.
23-26 But refuse foolish and ignorant speculations, knowing that they produce quarrels. The Lord's bond-servant must not be quarrelsome, but be kind to all, able to teach, patient when wronged, with gentleness correcting those who are in opposition, if perhaps God may grant them repentance leading to the knowledge of the truth, and they may come to their senses and espace from the snare of the devil, having been held captive by him to do his will.

Put God in charge

I finally got a copy of The Message last night. I have been wanting to get a copy ever since a PWOC study and someone kept reading what it said about what we were studying. The purpose of The Message is not to use it as a study Bible but to just read from it. The idea isn't to water down the Bible but to read the Bible like a book you would read for pleasure. It is written in words we would use everyday. The intro says to let God take the reins-teaching you, knowing you, and changing you. Wow. If we all could have teachable hearts and use God as our teacher. WHEW. What a thought!

Everything with a Place & a Purpose

Proverbs 16
Mortals make elaborate plans, but God has the last word. Humans are satisfied with whatever looks good; God probes for what is good. Put God in charge of your work, then what you've planned will take place. God made everything with a place and purpose; even the wicked are included-but for judgment. God can't stomach arrogance or pretense; believe me, he'll put those upstarts in their place. Guilt is banished through love and truth; Fear-of-God defects evil. When God approves of your life, even your enemies will end up shaking your hand. Far better to right and poor than to be wrong and rich. We plan the way we want to live, but only God makes us able to live it.

Live for today

This is awesome! Thanks Pops for sending it my way.

http://www.positivepause.com

A special prayer for you

Each and every one of us are going through tough times right now, but God is getting ready to bless you in a way that only He can. My instructions were to pick four people that I wanted God to bless, and I picked you, people who read my blog. This prayer is powerful, and prayer is one of the best gifts we receive. There is no cost but a lot of rewards. Let's continue to pray for one another.
The Prayer: Father, I ask You to bless my friends, relatives and those I care deeply for who are reading this right now. Show them a new revelation of Your love and power. Holy Spirit, I ask You to minister to their spirit at this very moment. Where there is pain, give them your peace and mercy. Where there is self-doubt, release a renewed confidence through Your grace. Where there is need, I ask you to fulfill their needs. Bless their homes, families, finances, their goings and their comings. In Jesus' precious name, Amen.

All hope is in Him and Him alone

Psalm 62:1-8

My soul waits in slience for God only; From Him is my salvation.
He only is my rock and my salvation, My stronghold; I shall not be greatly shaken.
How long will you assail a man, That you may murder him, all of you,
Like a leaning wall, like a tottering fence? They have counseled only to thrust him down from his high position; They delight in falsehood; They bless with their mouth, But inwardly they curse.
My soul, wait in silence for God only, For my hope is from Him.
He only is my rock and my salvation, My stronghold; I shall not be shaken.
On God my salvation and my glory rest; The rock of my strength, my refuge is in God.
Trust in Him at all times, O people; Pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us.

Conduct yourself worthy

Philippians 1:27-30
Only conduct yourselves in a manner worthy of the gospel of Christ, so that whether I come and see you or remain absent, I will hear of you that you are standing firm (AMEN-thank God I am) in one spirit, with one mind striving together for the faith of the gospel; in no way alarmed by your opponents-which is a sign of destruction for them, but of salvation for you, and that too, from God. For to you it has been granted for Christ's sake (on the cross), not only to believe in Him, but also to suffer (trials) for His sake, experiencing the same conflict which you saw in me, and now hear to be in me.

Keep the faith! Keep the main thing the main thing!

Victory in battles

In our Sunday school lesson, there is this wonderful quote about battles we will face:
The reason why many fail in battle is because they wait until the hour of battle. The reason why others succeed is because they have gained their victory on their knees long before the battle came...Anticipate your battles; fight them on your knees before temptation comes, and you will always have victory.
R.A. Torrey

Keep praying!

Another battle...or is it?

Every Woman's Battle by Shannon Ethridge. Wow. So heart wrenching to read about yourself. I can see where I have failed God in many areas. I am thankful for my many friends who have tried to help me be a better person and to keep me accountable for various aspects of my life. Thank you forever friends :) You know who you are.
Last night I read this quote from The Message, 2 Corinthians 10:3-5
The world doesn't fight fair. But we don't live or fight our battles that way...The tools of our trade aren't for marketing or manipulation, but they are for demolishing that entire massively corrupt culture. We use our powerful God-tools for smashing warped philosophies, tearing down barriers erected against the truth of God, fitting every loose thought and emotion and impulse into the structure of life shaped by Christ. Our tools are ready at hand for clearing the ground of every obstruction and building lives of obedience into maturity.
I don't usually like to quote from The Message but I thought this was worth quoting. Isn't that the truth, the world doesn't fight fair? Life isn't fair. God didn't tell us this would be an easy road. But going through trials make us stronger and bring us closer to Him. AMEN! Keep making the main thing the main thing. Matthew 22:37-38 Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment.

Battle

I am currently reading Every Man's Battle by Stephen Arterburn and Fred Stoeker. What an eye opener! I like what I read last night about counting the cost. What is your Christian life costing you? It costs something to learn about Christ but it costs a lot to live like Christ. Wow...that is earth shattering. The author also compared excellence and obedience. I thought they were so similiar but they are so different. He says American businesses are in search of excellence. They could be in search of perfection, of course-perfect products, perfect service-but perfection is too costly and eats into profits. Rather than be perfect, businesses know it is enough to seem perfect to their customers. By stopping short of perfection, they find a profitable balance between quality and costs. How far can we go and still seem perfect? Excellence is a mixed standard while obedience is a fixed standard. We want and shoot for the fixed standard. Fred asked himself, How far can I go and still be called a Christian? The book isn't just for men. There is a section at the end of the chapters designed to help women understand and support the men they love. If I only would have known some of these things that cause temptation and that a man can fight to win. So if you want to know the struggles every man faces, this is a must read.

Ezekiel 6:9
Then in the nations where they have been carried captive, those who will remember me-how I (God) have grieved by their adulterous hearts, which have turned away from me, and by their eyes, which have lusted after their idols. They will loathe themselves for the evil they have done.

Praise be to God that He forgives our sins. But He knows our heart and will only forgive if we are asking from our heart.

Psalms getting me through

Psalm 71:12-16
O God, do not be far from me; O my God, hasten to my help! Let those who are adversaries of my soul be ashamed and consumed; Let them be covered with reproach and dishonor, who seek to injure me. But as for me, I will hope continually. And will praise You yet more and more. My mouth shall tell of Your righteousness and of Your salvation all day long; for I do not know the sum of them. I will come with the mighty deeds of the Lord God; I will make mention of Your righteousness, Yours alone.

I sometimes feel all alone, with just Simba here with me. But God is with me. He has not forsaken me. He sends me friends who comfort me in times when I just need a hug. It is God who is allowing me to hold on to the this thread that I am clinging to. God tells me there is hope and I am relying on this hope. I just have to keep being reminded of this hope because my flesh just wants to give up. Our lives are a testimony of what God has done for us. Thank you God for doing so many things for me even though I don't deserve them.

Do not give the devil a foothold

Ephesians 4:27-32 and do not give the devil an opportunity. He who steals must steal no longer; but rather he must labor, performing with his own hands what is good, so that he will have something to share with one who has need. Let no unwhilesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a words as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear. Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.
We get the Command magazine, which is a magazine on Christian perspectives on life in the military. What a great article today. It talks about spiritually how important it is to defend our position against all enemies. Paul strongly pleaded with the church at Ephesus not to give the devil a foothold or an opportunity to cause a person to sin. Each person must live a life filled with the Holy Spirit in order to prevent the devil from securing a foothold. Geez, what a spiritual battle we are living in today. Be on guard! The devil is stronger than we give him credit for. We have the choice to let him prevail or to prevent his schemes.
Joshua 1:7-9 Only be strong and courageous; be careful to do according to all the law which Moses My servant commanded you; do not turn from it to the right or to the left, so that you may have success wherever you go. This book of the law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it; for then you will make your way propserous, and then you will have success. Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous! Do not tremble or be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.

Thank you friends

I thank God for all of my friends who have been checking on me, calling me, making sure I am okay. THANK YOU!! Also thank you for checking my blog even though I have been neglecting blogging. Thank you for checking back to see if I have posted. So today I just want to give some scriptures that I have been clinging to.

Mark 10:8-9 And the two shall become one flesh; so they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.

2 Samuel 22:2-4 The Lord is my rock and my foretress and my deliverer; My God, my rock, in whom I take refuge, My shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold and my refuge; My savior, You save me from violence. I call upon the Lords, who is worthy to be praised, and I am saved from my enemies.

He hasn't given me anything I cannot handle. Even though divorce is lurking, even though I don't want a divorce, God will be faithful and provide for my every need. Please pray that Lance will rely on the promises of God as I have been able to. He will bless those that keep His commandments. If we seek His face, He will bless us and provide for our every need. But we have to ask. He is willing to give as long as we ask. He will also forgive us if we repent. God knows our heart and knows if we are asking for forgiveness honestly.
He is waiting.....................................................

Revive me O LORD

Psalm 143 Hear my prayer, O Lord, Give ear to my supplications! Answer me in Your faithfulness, in Your righteousness! And do not enter into judgment with Your servant, For in Your sight no man living is righteous. For the enemy has persecuted my soul; He has crushed my life to the ground; He has made me dwell in dark places, like those tho have long been dead. Therefore my spirit is overwhelmed within me; My heart is appalled within me. I remember the day of old; I meditate on all Your doings; I muse on the work of Your hands. I stretch out my hands to You; My soul longs for You, as a parched land. Answer me quickly, O LORD, my spirit fails; Do not hide Your face from me, Or I will become like those who go down to the pit. Let me hear Your lovingkindness in the morning; For I trust in You; Teach me the way in which I should walk; For to You I lift up my soul. Deliver me, O LORD, from my enemies; I take refuge in You. Teach me to do Your will, For You are my God; Let Your good Spirit lead me on level ground. For the sake of Your name, O LORD, revive me. In Your righteousness bring my soul out of trouble. And in Your lovingkindness, cut off my enemies And destroy all those who afflict my soul, For I am Your servant.

God's love is sufficient for me

Sometimes I look at life and wonder why some things happen. Then you look back awhile later and you see how God held you up when you were too weak to even get up in the morning. Thank you Jesus for holding me up and loving me unconditionally. Family and friends fail me but your love is everlasting. I am so thankful I have an intimate relationship with my heavenly Father. He knows my every need. He supplies me with everything.
As I sit here with tears rolling down my face because I don't know what today or tomorrow holds, I can find comfort in the fact God knows and he won't put anything on me I can't handle.
Jer. 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
Psalm 56:3-4 "When I am afraid, I will trust in you In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I will not be afraid. What can mortal man do to me?"
Lord God, I choose to walk this journey with You, realizing that my pain is going to be a way of life for a while. But not forever. AMEN!

Jon Bon Jovi

I was able to go see Jon Bon Jovi in concert with a friend, Jennifer. I love that name by the way! Lance & I have many friends named Jennifer. I thank God for all the Jennifers in my life! Oh how you have blessed me in so many ways.
ANYHOW....the concert was AWESOME! The songs brought back many, many memories. I love Livin' On A Prayer, You Give Love a Bad Name and especially I'll Be There For You. There were about 18,000 people there. There weren't too many empty seats. Thanks Dale & Jennifer for the ticket and for being a godly example of a great marriage and such good friends. I am thankful God sent us here to serve Him. I love you guys & you too babies :)

Whirlwind

Have you ever witnessed a whirlwind? It comes out of no where and it spins and spins, really out of control. This explains my life right now. But I can rely on what God says in Hebrews 13: 5-8 Make sure that your character is free from the love of money, being content with what you have; for He Himself has said, "I will never desert you, nor will I ever forsake you," so that we confidently say, "The Lord is my helper, I will not be afraid. What will man do to me?" Remember those who led you, who spoke the word of God to you; and considering the result of their conduct, imitate their faith. Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.
WOW. Isn't the Word of God awesome? Thank you my friends who have sent scripture my way to ease this terrible pain I feel. I know my broken heart will heal in God's time. And I do feel His arms wrapped around me.
I am back in KY and taking one day at a time. I will keep you posted on what my plans are. I am relying on God for my strength. God is so awesome and so good to me. I so don't deserve His love. But I will take it and have received it time and time again.

Psalm 34:18

I guess God is trying to tell me something. Psalm 34:18 says The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
I have had 3 different people give me this scripture to read. I am sure brokenhearted right now and also fully relying on God's strength. My strength failed long ago. I couldn't make it without Him. Thank you Jesus for EVERYTHING you have done for me. Thank you for the phone calls and emails from friends and family. I rejoice in you. AMEN!!

Halibut cheeks

If you haven't had Halibut cheeks, you must try them. They are out of this world. I have been getting my fill of seafood. I am not at my fill yet so keep the seafood coming :) Yesterday we went on a harbor cruise and were able to go through the locks. That was so interesting. I am glad we did that even though it was raining quite hard. Then we went to dinner at Fin's and had the cheeks. Did I mention how delicious they were? YUMMY!! Then we went to a play that the local people put on. It was really good for a small production. It was "On Golden Pond." Aunt Jean says the musicals are outstanding. But we had a nice time. Today we are off to Sumner to visit my aunt and uncle's shop. We will also have dinner with them. I haven't seen them in awhile so it will be nice to catch up with them. I have enjoyed my time here to do some much needed thinking and to get away from everyday life for a bit. We have had a blast here. My aunt has been spoiling us rotten. I could get use to this!

Sunshine in Seattle?

Yes, there was a brief amount of sun yesterday. It has rained every day since I arrived. But that hasn't stopped our travels. We have seen a lot, have had a lot of excellent fish, visited good friends and am just enjoying being around family. Aunt Jean made excellent halibut! WOW was it good. I stayed with a friend last night and had a great visit with her and her children. I am so thankful for friends right now. It is so amazing how God has blessed me with the best friends ever. They have been so faithful to me and such prayer warriors! Thank you Jesus! I'll post pictures when I get home. Blessings to you and thank you for checking my blog.

Change in itinerary

Lance is driving to Maryland. I will be visiting my aunt in Seattle. I am looking forward to getting away for a few days and having some fun with family. I haven't been to Seattle in years so I am looking forward to doing the tourist thing. I just hope it doesn't rain the whole time. But if it does, I guess I will get to experience Seattle at her best! We will still have fun and just enjoy. I haven't found a lot of joy in my life lately. So hearing your joy may be a blessing to me.
Thank you again for faithful friends who are praying me through. I read Luke 12 on how God knows and cares about our every thought, our every need. Nothing that is covered up will no be revealed and hidden that will not be known. The very hairs of your head are all numbered. Do not fear: you are of more value than many sparrows. The Holy Spirit will teach you in that very hour what you ought to say. So I am keep silent for now until God reveals to me what to say.

Whew

Life just doesn't get any easier. I am so thankful God is holding me up through this hurricane in my life.
Since we feel it would not benefit Gracie to be placed in our home during this storm, the agency must find another home for her. Please pray that it will be a good Christian home and that they will love her as much as I love her. We are doing what is best for her and I just pray that I will find peace in knowing God is in control of everything. I'll keep you updated as I travel through this storm not alone but with God and your prayers. We will be traveling to Maryland next weekend to be with Lance's parents. Blessings to you as you bless those around you.

Snow! Snow! Snow! in TN

My new hobby

Yes, I made these from clay and spun the clay into a bowl and a dish. I have a great time "throwing pottery" and will post more of my works of art?!?!?!?! Okay, maybe not art but at least they can be used for candy dishes :) Thanks Karen for showing me. You are a great teacher! I look forward to doing more pottery with you.

Travel meeting

Well our travel meeting is planned. What does this mean? It means we will be talking with people in our travel group. I don't know any details: when we will travel, how many people are in our group. So hopefully this Thursday we will find out all our questions. So I will keep you updated on what information is given at this meeting. It is a conference call and we just call in to the agency's office. So Gracie, we are almost there!!

Still waiting

Sorry I haven't posted in awhile. Hubby is home (woo hoo!!) and it has been a whirlwind of activity around here. We are still waiting to hear our travel date to China. They have told us to keep Feb. 12th open but that isn't set in stone. So I am starting to by things on my list. Well I actually have about 3 lists right now so I guess I should consolidate them into one. We went Monday to Nashville to re-do our fingerprinting. For some reason they only give you 18 months to adopt with those fingerprints. Then they expire and you have to get them redone. I think it is to give them more money because I know our fingerprints haven't changed and we haven't been arrested or anything like that. I guess that is another China rule that I don't understand. I have lost count of the things we have had to do that I just don't understand. We will do everything we can in order to bring Gracie home. We are off to Alabama this weekend to visit friends there. We will stay in a cabin in the woods, overlooking a pond. It is so beautiful there! We are excited to have a retreat for a weekend. So I am sure I will have pictures to post when we return. If there is no China news, at least you can see Alabama :D

Christmas Photos

In The News

New Gracie Photos

Corinne (lady with blonde hair) just went to get her daughter, Loulee from the same orphanage Gracie is from. She found out Gracie is with a foster Mom (the lady holding Gracie) so she is getting good care. Here are some pictures from Corinne. YEAH! Gracie still has those kissable cheeks!

Bye Bye 2005

Well another year has bit the dust. Change calendars and do it all over again. Except each year we get older and make new friends. This year we have a lot to look forward to. I pray that you will have a blessed year.
I am finally home for awhile. I will have to start putting things together for China though. So I won't put the suitcases away. Oh how I am looking forward to that trip. I have had fun traveling seeing family and friends this year. I was able to see a lot of you and I am so thankful for that. I just hope I can bring Gracie to see all of you when she comes home. You can come visit her here too!